Stinker Flicks of 2008

Ladies and gentleman, welcome to the Stinkers of 2008! These were the absolute worst, most horrid atrocities, ones we are even ashamed to call “movies.” Why a collection of imbecilic buffoons actually decided to release crap like this, we will never know, but let us at least thank them for giving us these moments of hilarity and glee as we cast them into the depths of the stinkiest rubbish ever!

Hollywood

1. The Love Guru

What the f*ck has happened to Mike Myers? From sheer brilliance (Wayne’s World, Austin Powers) to utter tasteless crap. After The Cat in the Hat, the last thing we needed was yet another shitty mockery of the spiritually absurd.

2. 10,000 B.C.

This movie was so incredibly twisted of the real facts, we thought George W. Bush had some hand in it. While the trailers masterfully cast us in, we were just fed a bunch of wooly mammoth shit once the movie began.

3. Rambo

Stallone, you’re fat and old now. ‘Nuff said.

4. What Happens in Vegas

Is Cameron Diaz low on funds? Everybody knows that Ashton Kutcher’s sole claim to fame will forever be Punk’d, so why even try?

5. You Don’t Mess With The Zohan

Now I love me some Adam Sandler nonsense (i.e. Billy Madison, Happy Gilmore), but this one just wasn’t cutting it. They should have changed the title to You Don’t Go See The Zohan.

6. The Hottie & The Nottie

Paris Hilton stars in this…zzzzzz….

7. Beverly Hills Chihuahua

Haven’t we done the talking dog thing one too many times? The last thing we needed was it to be a chihuahua in freakin’ Beverly Hills. Shoot me!

8. Witless Protection

Larry the Cable Guy leading the star cast? It might have done better with Joe the Plumber…

9. Prom Night

You were probably screaming louder than the bimbos in this movie after you realized you paid to see this crap.

10. Babylon A.D.

Vin, we loved you after the original Fast and the Furious and XXX – but leave the futuristic crap movies to Ice Cube please.

Bollywood

1. Tashan

Glossing over crap doesn’t make it anything else other than crap. A bulimic Kareena Kapoor in bikini didn’t help much either.

2. Love Story 2050

Real life love duo Priyanka and Hrithik-look-alike Harman Baweja tried to propel Bollywood to the future. Instead, their time machine crashed and burned.

3. Drona

Another Hrithik-chaser flick, the Bachchan’s thought they could give Krrish a run for its money by putting a wad of cash behind Abhishek as a super-hero and a plot that slightly resembled Lord of the Rings. First lose the gut, buddy.

4. Kidnap

We expected more of Sanjay Gadhvi, but instead, he decided to keep his camera fixated on Minissha’s cleavage. Sanjay Dutt’s saggier eye bags nor Imran Khan’s glossed up look could save this rip off of Mel Gibson starrer Ransom.

5. Mission Istanbul

Vivek Oberoi and never-amounted-to-anything-in-life Zayed Khan? I would rather cast a log of driftwood in a lead role.

6. Thoda Pyar, Thoda Magic

Now Aditya Chopra is in the business of sexing up his family movies, especially with bikini-clad cows like Amisha Patel. Perhaps the worst “children’s” flick ever made.

7. God Tussi Great Ho

A very poor rip off of Bruce Almighty, even though, as always, the makers of this film claimed otherwise. God was not happy with this one.

8. Chamku

Chamku had Bobby Deol playing the wrong character 252nd time. Of course, what do you expect the audience to do?

9. Money Hai Toh Honey Hai

Ganesh Acharya, the larger than life choreographer once again tries to don the director’s hat and gives us this steaming pile of dung, bigger than one of his own perhaps.

10. Krazzy4

This movie was all about the item numbers by Shah Rukh Khan, Hrithik Roshan and Rakhi Sawant. Ignore the rest.

Well that’s it folks. Hope you brought the toilet paper to your machines after reading this one! The Stinkers of 2008 will surely leave streaks everywhere!